Honolulu, July 2024

 DAY 1.  

So I'm a Diamond Hilton and got the top of the Rainbow Tower.  The Hilton Hawaiian Village has fireworks on Fridays.  At first I thought I got the crap view as I could not see Diamond Head, but come to find out that the fireworks are right below in the Lagoon, so this was an excellent view.  I got room 3118, Penthouse Floor.  Room was pretty big for a normal room and had the bulk amenities but had a small bar of soap for your hands.  It had a mini-fridge.

Ok, so here's a village map.  It's huge.  Also below are the Diamond benefits which is an $18 credit per day up to 2 persons

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The free 2 bottles is a trick to get you to speak to the concierge.  Whatever.  There is a water bottle filling station behind the front desk, but I noticed the filter was on RED so obviously had not been changed recently, That was the only one I found on-property.  You are also issued towel cards under threat of $20 per towel for losing them.  I'm not sure how they enforce this, but in any event, you can't get a beach towel without one.  Whatever.  

View from Tropics restaurant.  Food not notable but I was starving.  I meant to go back sometime for happy hour, but never made it. Obligatory blue drink below.

DAY 2

My friends made us go to Hula Grill down the street at Outrigger to get the Hula Pie.  Touristy bur nicer view upstairs at Hula Grill and a lot more peaceful than Duke's downstairs.  Could have walked but we drove and parked at the Post Office which was relatively inexpensive.

We then hit up the Polynesian Cultural Center way on the other side of the island as our friends booked a tour there.  I've been there a couple times and while I would not go again, for first time Hawaii folks it's ok.  Notably no alcohol in Laie or at the Center so make it a sober day.  They do stuff like walk on fire and climb up a tree to get coconuts and put on cultural shows.  If you have kids, it's a must-see.  If not.. meh.  There is a cool. Polynesian Football Hall of Fame small exhibit there.  

We went to the Luau but ducked out before the fire show as my driver was tired and it's about an hour drive home.  the Luau was ok, a lot of different foods.  I didn't care for the fish but the pork was stellar.  There's a little show that goes on there too, and you get a lei and pineapple drink (but again no alcohol so...maybe bring your mini).

THE DAYS ARE NOW GETTING BLURRY.

This was the view from the Lagoon Tower which is from the timeshare looking toward the Rainbow Tower.

At the Hotel Ilikai next door which looks very dated is a cool happy hour at the top 30th floor called Pesca.  Good views, good drinks. I went there a couple times.  The sliders were substantial and octopus was good but see below for small ahi serving.  Anyway, nice atmosphere with a cool open view elevator if you can find it.

This was the view from Pesca

Beach day.

I ventured down the street and ate at this cafeteria like place.  Next time I would just get the udon but they do handmade the noodles here.  I tried the katsu and was going to get it over rice but the guy asked if I wanted noodles and so of course I had to try it.  I also got some a la carte tempura which was good.

Friends wanted to go to Aoki which is a Benihana style place.  Drink wasn't good and was overly foamy blue.  ewww.  

Pesca ahi, which is good but not substantial.

View from my room on 31st floor of Rainbow Tower.

View from Penthouse in Lagoon Tower.

There is no CLEAR at this airport and First Class/Premium bag check is hidden in the corner.  Pre Check was down the hall at checkpoint 4.  It went fairly quickly.  This was the slowest Starbucks in existence for food.  The airport is HOT - no AC until you get to your gate.  Alaska Air is taking me home now!  Bye-Bye Hawaii!   Until we meet again.

Maui, Grand Wailea, Kihei

 my first scathing review of a property - Grand Wailea

Despite the beauty of the outside of this place, the service was horrific.  Never book with a group.  We got the Molokini Wing, which is basically a shitty wing, a mile from the front desk, facing the south parking garage. Never mind that we were Hilton Diamond members. Never mind that we offered to pay to upgrade. No, we were with a group, so we were relegated to the total shit wing.  The 9th and top floor was given but still parking lot view.

Day 2 we complained as others in our group had better rooms.  Rather than accommodate, they accused me of basically lying and had me name names of other guests!  Crazytown.  This front desk needs a lot of training.  I will never stay there again with status, and with a group.  Most of the rest of the gang had nice rooms in the Chapel wing, some had suites, most had ocean views.  The rest of us in the crap wing never want to speak of this or see this property again.  I can see random folks, but when a friend asked to stay near us, they told him no, it would be a downgrade from his current location in the Lagoon Wing on the ground floor.  That's what prompted the call to the front desk.  At the time I didn't know the others were hanging out in the Chapel wing with nice views.  Diamonds and Gold do get a free continental breakfast.  The tip is to ask for it to go, and they bring it to you in a bag.  Otherwise you must wait for a table.  Peasants.

This is what we looked like when starving.

Island Gourmet Market next door at the shops. 
Best cheap eats in the area.  Stock up.

 Emerald Course - Wailea Golf. Where's the booze.

The Emerald Course was great.  However, service again here was dismal.  The old guy at check in was a grump.  We had cheap tee time of 3 but he said no one was booked between 2-3 but if we wanted to start early it would cost double.  This would have been fine and we probably would have had we been told they throw everyone off the course at around 5:30 and claim it takes 10 min to drive to the shop.  I think they all just wanted to go home.  When we checked in, he also claimed we could probably finish if we started at 3, and said it gets dark at like 6 something.  Lies, all lies.  Additionally, the beverage cart didn't come for the first 45 minutes at least. It got to the point where we called the pro shop and asked them to come out, and asked the marshal.  Pro tip, just bring your own, it's not like they will notice since they're so inattentive.  Also, the starter did let us start before 3.  So just check in at pro shop for your designated tee time and go see the friendly starters.  They are much nicer.  They also won't let you buy alcohol from the restaurant Gannon's and take it on the course. So.... pack your bag accordingly.

Beautiful views, though.

 Lineage  - another disappointment.

The best thing here were the drinks.  Just don't eat.  The apps were good but basically no one liked the main dishes.  Then, the check came.  All hell broke loose.  She asked one of us if we are from here and he said NO - she then said oh no, I have to charge you for the rice (even though someone asked earlier and it was free).  No Kama'aina discount. That's fine, but she assumed before we were local so it showed 20% off our check.  THEN I realized she had only charged me the 20% service charge FOR THE ENTIRE TABLE.  So my bill was like $70 but my service charge was $60. Ummmm, then she tried to tell me our math was wrong but when I said it's impossible that $60 is 20% of $70, she took all our bills back.  She then took the discount off everyone, charged them for rice and service charge and was totally rude about all of it.  After I got home I realized none of my apps were even on my bill.  One of my buddies probably got screwed for it... never again.

chicken skin drink

super cute cocktail

 Chicken skin drink was good tho.

 So it's about time I tell you, I love Bud Light.  I was pleased as a side note that all our receptions had not only the microbrews, wine, mai tai's, pina coladas and liquor, but also Bud Light.  If only I had stuck to that....  But anyway, was happy to see it as the light beer of choice at the Grand Wailea.

 Beautiful sunsets, no filters.  I don't know how to use filters anyway, so my pictures are "as they are".

 That's the Chapel.  The luau was on the Chapel lawn.  There was another luau on the other side of the resort, I assume they got the good one.  Ours was really short. Food was good but there were two buffet lines - one salads the other meats.  Almost created a riot. 

The Cabana was the best thing here. 

Finally, the last day, as of course we could not get later than 1PM checkout again despite being a Diamond (or they said $150 extra per hour), we bought a cabana.  The $250 cabanas at the adult pool were a steal.  They have a fridge and a little locker to put your stuff.  We hid in our cabana in peace, and took a nap. The cabana also has a little snack of banana bread and fruit.  The adult pool was great.  The other pools were kid-infested other than the Grotto Bar which is a swim up bar that was fun.

 Overall Maui was beautiful, but the treatment at the Grand Wailea of a Diamond member there on a group stay was disgusting.  Next time I'm staying at Four Seasons.  The other trip highlights were Sansei restaurant in Kihei, and the outlet malls in Lahaina, but that was quite a drive.  Ko at the Four Seasons was nice, apps were great, but again the main meals were not that impressive for the price.  Kihei Caffe for breakfast is good - we sat in the inside room at 7AM and it was quiet.  Outside was crowded.  Fun trip with friends, but next time staying elsewhere!